24 May 2008. A week’s postponement to our intro diving caused by early stormy season in May didn’t dampen our high spirits. It even enflamed our excitement all the more. But sleeping at 3:00am prior to the under the sea adventure due to my abnormal limits of internet use, a 4:30am call time was obviously impossible. Our master diver Ryan should know better — even if it meant we were to be fetched, my pituitary gland automatically sent out messages to cause sudden muscle spasms.
I normally rest good hours of sleep back in the days, but ever since I was introduced to the world of nomads my sleeping time became erratic it’s more apt to call it a snooze.
That’s true…I swear.
I heard endless missed calls at around 4:30am but my locomotive ability wasn’t sufficient to move a single hand until our “pick-up” personnel Ryan and Rissa finally had the lobby guard forcefully woke me up through my intercom. They had to eventually come up to my room to strip off what’s left of my drowsiness.
Late Start
At 6am our road trip to the land of interesting Filipino accent (aka Batangas) commenced. It was immensely enjoyable because it was a wacky group headed by our Master Diver Ryan, and the seven dwarves Rissa, Jason, Helen and her brother Greg, and I. We were just to meet the gruesome twosome KM and Simon at Dive and Trek Resort.
Just so everybody knows, there would have been a really great addition to our group, Jaja Valencia, whose real name we recently unearthed (it’s for us to know, for you to find out). But our ‘ever-reliable’(?) master diver gave out the wrong number of Rissa to her. Poor girl she had to wait in vain!
‘Bagets’ Road Trip
Along the way we enjoyed the astonishing views in Tagaytay especially the breathtaking Taal Lake and Volcano, and had a stopover at ROWENA’S to buy us some snacks. I strongly recommend their Blueberry Cheesecake.
We also had delicious breakfast at Pancake House for some waffles Rissa had been craving for since the previous week. I sensed whoever maneuvered the choice of restaurant would be greatly chastised by her. Now that’s something you wouldn’t seriously wish to happen. Unless of course, you wish to meet a She-Hulk.
After a while of deliberation about our shared orders and complicated requests made to our server Neil, Jason and I ended up having a double-order of Waffles with Peach and we just had to pay for it because as Neil was repeating the final list, we were just nodding like slave dogs. It was a lesson learned the hard way.
30% of my energy during road trips is for non-stop talking and 70% for sleeping. And like any typical friend of mine, one of them just had to enjoy snapping shots of anyone sleeping. Unfortunately as always, I am one strong contender for “The Victim”. And as always, the main culprit is Rissa.
Dive and Trek Resort
After almost 5 hours of journeying (with stops), we finally arrived at our destination in Batangas. The boat ride to Dive and Trek resort was about 15-20 minutes and we arrived at the resort at about 10:30am. According to our Master Diver Ryan, the Dive and Trek has the most beautiful diving spot closest to Metro Manila. Should any of you have violent reactions please course all your angst to Ryan Guzman.
Am I clear? I repeat, Ryan Guzman.
Before moving on, would you believe this retard was actually our Dive Instructor?
Yes, our fates and lives were totally under massive threat to meet final destination. *Knocks on wood!*
Anyway, there were a number of people who were at Dive and Trek Resort because it was a Saturday. But heck! Wherever we set foot on is our turf – and we will fight for it like mad dogs and territorial beasts.
Greg went first after a short introduction to scuba diving because he had to leave for Thailand the next day. Tip: You must have at least 24 hours gap prior to your flight otherwise you’ll end up having bends – let’s just say your veins would be like that of Incredible Hulk’s and you’ll eventually end up looking like a zombie character in 28 Days Later movie.
Helen, Jason, and I spent more than an hour of snorkeling in the deep waters enjoying the colourful world of Poseidon. It was then Jason’s turn for scuba diving and Greg joined in on the snorkeling fun. We stayed too long my fingertips wrinkled like my great grandma’s until our tummies crumbled in protestations.
Sad fact: Helen, Greg, KM, Simon, and I had to wait a long time for the rest for lunch. Oh, for 2000 pesos, it already included the boat ride and the scuba diving necessities, towels, life vests, the great food and snacks, and bottomless beverage of Milo and orange juice. It was all worth it.
Paparazziiii!!!!!
After an hour of binging, I sunbathed whilst Helen was underwater trying to look for a pearl amidst the wide coral sanctuary.
Then it was my turn. I caught a fish that bit my cheek, but I let it go because poking was not allowed in the first place. But it was just so tempting!
DON’T JUDGE ME.
Crotch Grab is part of scuba diving
Birdy Mode
Showing peace sign to baby sharks below the coral
Master Diver Ryan tried to feed me to the giant clam!
Sizzling fishy
- I love this Fried
I love this for my Tinola
I love this steamed
I love this grilled
I love seafood pasta!
For Sale: Underwater Feather Duster
One giant pickle for take-away
Rub the teat for some pearls
Underwater Version of Mother and Child
After serious eating, drinking of Milo, and long hours of snorkeling, we just can’t stop from taking silly pictures of ourselves, especially our all-time favourite, the jump shots. Move over, Michael Jordan!
Humanised fish
Up, Up, and Blag!%#@*
Oblation, Statue of Liberty, Buddha, Cleopatra, Jesus
Street Fighter XXX
Shiva
Do-Re-Mi-Fa-So-La-Ti-Do
Step 1
Step 2
Step 3
Revitalising mode
Studio 23
Ex-convicts
And there’s this strange dancing video that Rissa took of us. She tricked us! She told us to dance to the tune of that “wild music” blaring from her speakers for a “picture-taking”, only to end up making us the silly victims of her wicked video prank.
On Our Way Home
About an hour of hitting the road, Ryan’s car smelt of nasty sock burnt rubber we just had to stop at a dark place but with few houses around. It was already past 8pm. It turned out the few people who were living there were extremely hospitable I could sponsor for their sainthood. It’s not an exaggeration, except if they were a band of cannibals trying to trap a rowdy gang for our succulent meat. They even offered to cook for us upon hearing that we were on our way to have dinner at TAJ in Tagaytay. They also tried to fix Ryan’s car so I went out and slept at a bushy waiting shed. I think I was that hungry the snakes refused to come my way.
Since something important was broken in Ryan’s car, we decided to just leave and have Ryan stay at a hostel and return for it the next day. Without a single car passing by, a very kind tricycle driver was forced to carry 10 people inside (and outside) his small vehicle the bottom part literally scratched the road every 5 seconds. And it was a relatively long drive. Uh-oh!
How to Destroy a Tricycle with 10 Strays
We have babies inside those huge bags lol I kid!
Tres Marias de Lemery
The bus station was still closed so we first had our 10:30pm dinner at a street food joint for some Tapas, garlic rice, and cold Pepsi. Hmmm! Guess what? We found a lost soul…a Buddhist kid! Want proof?
Are we in Tibet?
I felt a strong repulsive force when Ryan and Bernard the tricycle driver came back with a bag of “Balut” – a Philippine-famous steamed duck-egg with a fetus monster inside plus few tablespoons of spoiled pee. I ended up throwing mine after a “serious” acting. I felt remorseful for cheating though, but I just can’t handle the smell and the baby monster. Gross!
Each had manual laying of egg for dinner lol
I hate Balut. End of Story
Lemery Bus Station
12:00pm. Rissa had to go diving the next day anyway so she stayed in Batangas with Ryan. We were too early at the terminal the first bus departs at 2am so we had nothing to do but to wait for a couple more hours. To kill the time, Helen, Greg, Jason, KM, Simon, and I played “Shaggedy(?)”, and Charades that lasted until inside the bus. Oh! Helen, Jason, and I won. Hooray!
Would you believe we were chasing our bus here? Joke
Our day ended and started anew with only but smashingly great memories. However great a destination is, the basal strength of ultimate satisfaction lies with the people you share your experiences with. Good thing there wasn’t a single rotten companion included in our day’s adventures.
*Looks in front of the mirror*.
Or so I thought.
La Buena Familia
THE ROYAL SHOW 